


When the sun hits

by just_a_sad_person



Category: Dead Poets Society (1989)
Genre: Coming of Age, F/M, First Kiss, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Gay Male Character, Gay Panic, LGBTQ Character, LGBTQ Themes, M/M, and they were ROOMMATES, mlm
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-04
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-17 02:01:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,578
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29834322
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/just_a_sad_person/pseuds/just_a_sad_person
Summary: What could have happened between this two boys.
Relationships: Charlie Dalton & Neil Perry, Charlie Dalton & Steven Meeks, Chris Noel/Knox Overstreet, Todd Anderson & Neil Perry, Todd Anderson/Neil Perry
Kudos: 11





	1. Lonely

The Anderson household was silent, the usual sound of the radio or television was not present that night. At dinner nothing new happened, the small talk that was so familiar to the family occurred again. Just like every other night. 

_“How was work?” Mrs Anderson would ask her husband._

_He would reply with a “fine” and then complain about stubborn customers._

_Mrs Anderson would then talk about the latest gossip about their neighbors._

Other than that there was nothing else to talk about.

After dinner Tod made his way to his bedroom. Upon opening the door sadness filled his heart. Looking around the empty room that he once called his safe place made him feel sick on the stomach. All his belongings were packed, in exception of what his father considered unnecessary. The emptiness of the room came in company with a cold atmosphere. 

His stomach turned into a knot at the reason of the state of his room. His father thought it would be a great idea to send him into a prestigious private school. Mr Anderson’s excuse was that his child needed the best of the education he could get. Tod preferred to think that his parents just wanted to get rid of him.

Changing into his pajamas he felt the lump in his throat get thicker. It had been bothering him all day. The guilt of feeling like a burden to his parents was killing him. 

Tod heard a knock on the door, seconds later his mother’s head appeared through the agaped door. “Just wanted to see if everything is ready for tomorrow,” Mrs Anderson asked with a tone on her voice that Tod knew oh so well. Fake concern blazed with empathy, trying to mask the love only given by a mother.

Swallowing the lump on his throat he nodded his head. “Everything's ready”.

In return his mother did a gesture that he knew just as well as the tone. She smiled. Fake, trying to mask the same emotions as the motherly tone. After that she left, leaving Tod alone again. 

Getting into his bed he sighed pulling the covers over his body. The coldness of the bed that lacked human contact made him shiver.

He tossed and turned trying to find a good sleeping position. He turned aging and faced the ceiling. 

He tried to swallow the lump on his throat but his attempts were futile. He thought about what would happen tomorrow. He would leave his house. 

It was a relief for him, he didn’t consider that house a home.Truth be told he felt incredibly lonely. Even unloved. 

His eyes were starting to resemble glass and his throat was aching from the lump. He never found comfort in the people he was told they would love him unconditionally. Tod didn’t consider them family. How could he? They never were there for him. If they somehow were the emotions wouldn’t feel genuine. Loneliness would be his great companion in those times in which he needed someone. 

Closing his eyes he let the tears roll down his face. The lump on his throat finally snapped. Choked sobs left his mouth, muffled by his hand. He hated how apathetic they were towards him. 

When all his feelings were finally spilled out he closed his eyes. The headache from the crying left his body numb. Peace washed over him, drifting off to sleep moments later. 

Maybe he would find a family there. Or maybe someone to be with him when needed. Maybe he would even unfriend loneliness.


	2. I walk the line

The warm light of the dawn shone through the blinds in Tod's bedroom. The alarm that he had set the day before went off. His heavy eyelids snapped open, lazily he lifted his arm to turn off the alarm. 

He changed into the clothes that his mother had picked up the day before. He stood in front of the mirror in his bedroom. Dress pants, a white button down and a blazer that was too thick for his liking. Tod looked like his father dressed like that, he didn’t like it at all. 

Walking downstairs he could hear his parents already awake. Tod took a seat next to his father on the kitchen table, Mr Anderson didn’t raise his eyes from the newspaper in front of him. Mrs Anderson served breakfast. “Are you nervous Tod?” She asked with the same tone she would always use with him. 

Tod shook his head no. “He shouldn’t be. If Jeremy could he can,” Mr Anderson talked, still not daring to take his eyes away from the paper. 

After breakfast Mr Anderson carried Tod’s luggage to the car and started the car engine. Everything was ready for him to go and he knew that the moment he got into that car there was no turning back. He chose to go. 

The car started moving, leaving the house behind. Soon enough the car left the neighborhood and was now driving through the countryside. The only sound in the car was Johnny Cash’s voice coming from the radio. 

_As sure as night is dark and day is light_  
_I keep you on my mind both day and night_  
_And happiness I've known proves that it's right_

Tod was looking out the window. All he could see was a blur of different shades of green, every now and then white and black spots would appear between the sea of greens.

After a few hours of driving the car passed an entrance, next to it a sign said “Welton Academy”. Tod felt a knot on his stomach. The knot could be called by a lot of people: “butterflies”; but this wasn’t a pleasant experience in his opinion. Either way, the weird feeling on his stomach was due to the anxiety he was feeling. 

His father parked and got out, telling Tod to leave everything in the car because they would come for it after the “ceremony”. Without questioning his father Tod followed him into an old-looking building. 

They entered a salon with high ceilings. Students and their parents were seated on wooden benches. On the front of the room there was a podium. His family sat on one of the benches towards the middle of the room, Tod sat in between his parents. 

After everyone was seated the ceremony began. The sound of a bagpipe echoed around the room, everyone turned around. The doors on the back of the room opened, allowing men in robes to come in, along them four students carried tapestries. They made their way to the front of the room and an old man spoke. “Ladies and gentlemen. Boys, a light of knowledge.”

The man kept talking about something that happened a hundred years ago, Tod had no idea where the man was heading to. Then he asked a question: “gentlemen, what are the four pilars?” 

Students stood from their seats. Mr Anderson encouraged Tod to do the same. In between the sea of boys with uniforms, Tod stood out from the crowd. He felt out of place and he didn’t know the answer to that question. 

_“Tradition_

_Honor_

_Discipline_

_Excellence”_

The boys said in unison and then sat down. Tod moved his lips trying to make his act believable. The man continued to talk throughout the whole ceremony, at some point he introduced a new professor. 

When the ceremony ended everyone in the room went outside. The younger students were crying while their parents bid them goodbyes. Mr Anderson gave Tod his luggage. “Be good,” he said while patting Tod’s shoulder. 

“We’ll miss you.” Mrs Anderson said through fake tears, cupping Tod’s cheek. He felt uncomfortable by the performative affection.

Then Tod walked into the school alone, without his parents company. While crossing a courtyard a boy came from behind him. “I heard that you were my roommate,” he patted Tod’s back, “I’m Neil Perry.” He wore a friendly smile on his face and Tod couldn’t help but smile back at him. 

The pair walked together to their shared room. Neil chose the bed on the right, therefore the left side of the room was now Tod’s. Not so long after a red-headed boy appeared on the door, he made a rude comment absentmindedly about Neil’s new roommate- Tod; when he noticed Tod's presence he left. He felt his neck grow hot with embarrassment. The comment caused Neil to chuckle, which he muffled with his hand before telling Tod not to worry. 

Setting his trunk on top of his bed Tod started unpacking. Four boys walked in this time. “Meeks the door.” One of them said.

“Yes sir.” Another one of them said.

The four boys talked to Neil while completely ignoring Tod. The same boy who asked the red-headed boy to close the door laid on Neil’s bed and lit a cigarette. 

When Tod tried to put his desk setup the red.headed boy noticed him. One by one the boys said their names to Tod. Knox, Steven, Charlie and Gerald. 

A knock was heard on the door. Charlie quickly put out his cigarette. Mr Perry appeared through the door and wanted to talk to Neil outside. Tod was left alone with the four boys who he only knew their names. The atmosphere of the room was heavy with awkwardness as nobody knew what to say, but they wanted to hear what Mr Perry was saying. When they heard him finish talking to Neil they went to check on him.


End file.
